For this article we take to the smallest room in the house for a conversation about... well, graffiti in the bathroom. We've always been proud of being one of the only groups to feature writing in our packs and this thread just broadens our appeal that much more.

'Twas started by Agnostic, but as usual these things spiral all over the place.


AG>   has any one read some good bathroom scribblings lately?
AG>
AG>  in the College bathroom today:
AG>
AG>  You are all gum in some woman's hair
AG>
AG> (add to make a list)
AG>
SE>  Don't write on this wall (Langara College washroom)
SE>
AG>  The Shah is buried beside Lee Harvey Oswald
AG>
CT>  Flush twice; it's a long way to the cafeteria.
CT>
HI> If your reading this, you must be hanging out here. (douglas college)
HI>
PE> coquitlam center bathroom stall:
PE>
PE> gay males:be here at 6pm on wednesdays for nameless anal sex. no regrets.
PE>
CT> L I N U X (on the ceiling of the benny's bathroom.  Something tells me
CT>            the f00l wrote it.)
CT>
ZK> The only practical vehicle for prison reform: A BULLDOZER  (bathroom in
ZK> the Spartacus building)
ZK>
FU> Call Linda for a good time at 936-9236 (The Pantry in Coquitlam Center)
FU>
CT> (on the condom machine)
CT>
CT> "This gum tastes like rubber."
CT>
CT> also,
CT>
CT> "Return baby here for refund."
CT>
MF> "nixon peed here"
MF>
MF>  i saw
MF>
MF> "  aids kill fags dead"
MF>
MF>  " so does igornarance"
MF>
ME> I was here.  His Royal Highness Prince Daniel. (U.B.C.)
ME>
CT>  I WUZ ERE
CT>  ERE I WUZ
CT>  WUZ I ERE?
CT>  YES I WUZ.
CT>
PK>  "here i sit, broken hearted
PK>   came to shit, but only farted."
PK>
PK>   tis old.
PE>   but i can do lamer.
PE>
PE>  "some come here to piss and think, other's come here to shit and stink,
PE>   but when i come here neither matters at all, i just read the bullshit
PE>   that's on the walls."
CT>
CT>  Lame.  "Here I sit, amongst the vapours, looking for some toilet paper.
CT>          how much longer will I linger before I have to use my finger?"
ZW>
ZW>  I sit here and contemplate
ZW>  whether to shit or masturbate.
ZW>
JB> My old school didn't have any real humour, just typical racist stuff like
JB> "Fuck hindhuz, Fuck Whitez," big swastikas..
CT>
CT> We got...
CT>
CT> "Fuck the skids.  Go back to Grand Ville street you fucken homos
CT> or prepar (crossed out) get ready to fight us.
CT>
CT> (as an afterthought) Or die when it snows."
CT>
CT> Someone's reply - "Maybe when you learn to spell."
JB>
JB> bahahah.. most downtown bathroom flame-scrawlings I've ever seen were
JB> political like 'NDP PIGS' or anti-conservative humor.
JB>
AG>   "I'm too afraid to use the phone
AG>    I'm too afraid to turn the light on
AG>    I'm so afraid I've lost control
AG>    I'm suffocating without a word..."
AG>
AG>                L. Reed         (Capilano College - - my doing last year)
AG>
CT> ... something which I wrote which apparently Darklock got written up
CT> in calligraphic handwriting and installed in his own potty.
CT>
CT> Your insides, they force you to rise from the table,
CT> and get to the crapper as quick as you're able.
CT>
CT> You leap on the john and your pants hit the floor,
CT> embarrassingly, you then close up the door.
CT>
CT> Out is expelled from your putrescent hole
CT> a smelly surprise in your porcelain bowl.
CT>
CT> It lands in the water, and makes a small splash;
CT> the frigid can water sends shocks through your ass.
CT>
CT> It sits all alone, floating putrid and green;
CT> Oft it is smelt, but it's never much seen.
CT>
CT> Content that you're finished your digestive caper,
CT> you clean up your bum with the soft septic paper.
CT>
CT> It raises no cries as you tug on the flush;
CT> away spins the bowlful of natural mush.
CT>
CT> The nasty green mess spirals down to the breach,
CT> You won't meet again 'till you go to the beach.
CT>
CT> You then wash your hands, with warm water and soap;
CT> If cleanliness was godliness, then you would be the Pope.
CT>
CT> Remember all these steps next time you're on the loo,
CT> and don't think of it as shitting, simply think of it as POO.
CT>
SA> In my school, it's mostly declarations of love or lust, commentaries on
SA> guy's performances in bed, so and so is a bitch, a slut, or "A lesbian
SA> who rapes dogs" (I asked whether or not it was males dogs or female dogs)
SA>
SA> When I do graffitti, I usually draw a crystal teardrop design, or
SA> something else I like. I've written philosopic statements, or political
SA> theories.
SA>
SA> Recently, in an agitated mood, I went into the washroom and covered a
SA> wall with a manifesto about how anything in the world was possible if you
SA> perceived it to be so etc etc etc.
ZK>
ZK> I used to do that, when I was in a horrible high school.
ZK>
ZK> "I eat your hate like love" was a favorite, as was "Just try and find me, cuz
ZK> I surround you."
ZK>
ZK> I was trained out of it when I went to a good high school. Grafitti was
ZK> less easy at Ideal because you were more likely to be caught and your
ZK> crimes brought up at School Meeting.
ZK>
SA> I am at a horrible high school, and since I consider my grafitti to be
SA> a much higher grade that the rest of it, I have no reason to stop. :)
SA>
SA> (re: manifesto) Anyway, last week, I went in and saw they erased it.
SA>
SA> "REPRESSION. ERASE THIS. 'someone tried to hold me down, come on try to
SA> shut me up' -hole" was what I replaced it with.
SA>
ZK> Although the desks in the science room were very colourful.
ZK> Someone once wrote "I LOVE BEATLE" in big white-out letters. (Don't
ZK> worry, it wasn't me.)
ZK>
SA> YeSh, desks and chairs at my school get the same treatment...I drew and
SA> wrote all over my grade 11 english desk. I saw it later in another room.

...

CT>  The secret to life is (scribbled over by someone else) FUCK

If you have any other interesting such writings that you think the world should see, don't hesitate to send them to us.

- Mistigris 1997 - Keepings our minds right in the gutter -