The lobster is from a misspoken Lobster porn is DISGUSTING (actually stated: BORING) at a Jazz Fest meet with TABNet, and the brick is what Cthulu wore (and all that he wore) while chasing Nuiwanda around the campfire at the first Wreck Beach meet.
 -click here to download the original ansi version of this infofile -
BOP ZOW----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This is Cthulu of Mistigris. Welcome to my solo pack. This evening we we will be focusing on the rightmost of my tentacles, that is, my writings. In the interests of good taste I will be saving discussion of the lobster and brick until our adult show later tonight, where I read all of my poems... naked. (If you ask me nicely, I'll explain them to you on the IRC.)

You may think that a meg and a half is a lot of size for writing to be taking up, and you'd be right. Raw text-wise, that's well on the way to a dictionary, but I don't claim to contain anywhere near so much: the focus on this archive is not myself, but rather those I have worked with. The subtitle of this collection is Illustrations and Descriptions and thus what we have here is not so much a collection of my writings (and certainly in most cases not of my favorite instances of my writings) but rather those you would have seen: lit for the scene contained in the company of graphics and pictures in most cases describing either the picture it accompanies or the name of the bulletin board they both promote. In considerably fewer cases the graphics illustrate what the words put forth and in a couple of cases the juxtaposition of word and pixel is a completely spurious and irrelevant one. We don't like to talk about those much so if you'll just follow me I'd like to take you on a bit of a tour though my illustrious and pathetic scene career.

ALL DRESSED UP AND NOWHERE TO GO ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh yes, I almost forgot - one more note before we proceed: though I have maintained the integrity (ugh, that word gives me stomachaches) of all of the pieces contained herein (file dates match those of the original release, where applicable, for those of you who like to view things chronologically and in progression) these poems have never looked so good: before ending up in this archive they were all combed and scrubbed and any and all ugly misspellings have been surreptitiously tidied up from the goofy state they may have inadvertently been released in - in the case of one poem, entire lines were omitted in the release, but letters and words have been mangled here and there over the years. For this pack they have been restored to their original state, that you can experience, if not the sheer literary merit which was never theirs, at least the impeccability of their rhythm and rhyme schemes. In addition to those changes, to avoid any confusion, I have changed all occurrences of my e-mail address to show my current one, just in case anyone tries to refer to them to contact me. SAUCE information has as well been updated in a few cases, and if you feel that with these changes accounted for, these still don't quite reflect your memories, well, remember that things ain't what they used to be and in most cases, they never were 8).

MAKING THE MOST OF MY LIMITATIONS ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For your entertainment, a review of sigs and headers used on occasion by myself to assert creative ownership over released product.
      by        ___
               (   \
        C  T H  \_% )L U !
                /  )(\
           _ _/   (  ) \ _ _
    ------(-|-)---)--(--(-|-)------
"Why choose the LESSER of two evils?!"
          (c) iMPERiAL '94
Would you believe me if I told you that this sort of thing was elite in 1994?

No, neither would I.

I acually used this in messages on BBSes. One less thing we have to worry about these days...

Darkforce's sig drawn for Cthulu, an ansi version of the above ascii.  Drawn while DF was still in iMPERiAL. Though we had our disagreements (see: Integrity) Darkforce was gracious enough to revamp the hideous ASCII octopus in a marginally-less-hideous ANSI incarnation after I wrote a lit for his board, House of Style.

At the time I was very upset that we still had to resort to the high-ASCII character (the lower-case delta squiggle, or indicator of a differential equation.  There's an HTML code for this for Macs, but no luck here) for the eyes. (There were very fiercely delineated boundaries between ANSI and ASCII in those days and newschool ASCII was still a glimmer in kHz's eye.)

It's interesting that I flaunted most of these affectations of eliteness at a time when I was arguably my least elite ever, a minor cog in a group whose main claim to success was merging with GRiP/AD. In fact, I think that I adopted the use of these sigs before I'd even released anything. (Then again, that took months. And my migration from the ANSI department to the lit division is a story all its own...)

sig for Cthulu drawn by Eerie back when he was still in Mist - late 1994 likely. A nice touch emerging from the frame of "I am 31l73++", my first attempt at subtle social commentary, illustrated by Eerie before he exploded.

The sig was apparently used without intentional irony.

sig for Cthulu drawn by Nitnatsnoc while he was in Integrity.  Appeared only in the ansi Mud, contained within this collection. My favorite of my various identifying marks, a more compact and less TABNet-centric version of the illustration crowning this infofile.

Key among this preference is that it promotes my group as much as it promotes myself - any prominence I attained in the scene (through guest appearances in ANSI collaborations in other groups - now it all starts to make sense) was strictly in an (unsuccessful) attempt to draw attention to my struggling group. More on that later. oh yeah - this is by Nitnatsnoc, bless his Queen-y heart.

SOME CLEVERNESS ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So you can have some idea as to the utter trash topics I was provided to work with over the years, I include here a sample 1993 WareZ BBS name generator. Simply match one word in COLUMN A with a word from COLUMN B (adding "of"s and "The"s where appropriate) and voila! An authentic 1992-1994 era BBS name! All words (and non-words: see "Grindoris") appearing in this generator we were used in real BBSes, most of which actually went up at some point! And as a bonus to you, I include sample end rhymes for the words in column B so you can try your hand at making your own geniune elite lits, which, at one time, were considered to be worth leech access on a local 7-to-10-day board.
 
 

COLUMN A COLUMN B rhymes with:
Screaming Toaster coaster
Digital Dreams scream
Forged Insanity inanity
Euphoric Doom gloom
Chronic Madness sadness
Harvest Perception (censored)
Altar (of) Domain again
Morbid Delusions illusions
Total Eclipse bogomips
Virtual Grindoris (???) florist
Dark Sacrifice fuzzy dice
Altered Moon spoon
Elusive Necrosis halitosis
Lethal Dreamscape cheesecake
Sarcastic Reality banality
Evil Holocaust lost
Suicidal Tomato potato
Menacing Asylum phylum
Dreams (of) Voracity elasticity
Fatal -X flex
Silicon Sector nectar

COPING NICELY, THANK YOU----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As anyone who's been keeping track can see, my profile in the scene has been even lower recently than it was before - keeping for the most part clear from releases of all sorts, but also far and beyond primarily absent (except as an incorrigible idler) on the IRC.***if this gets to be too much, just flip down to the end of this section

Fans of mine may be glad to know that I'm still writing; enemies may be glad to know that it's for the most part exclusively in real-life contexts and forums. I've been participating more and more in open-stage events and poetry slams in coffeeshops and bars for the past few years, and now appear regularly 4-5 times a month at various regular events around town - strictly as a hobby still, but though the potential audiences are smaller than the scene both the proportion and even sheer number of them who actually pay attention is considerably greater - encouragement, as it were, to continue devoting myself to such a forum. (Disclaimer: though there are occasionally people in black turtlenecks and berets present at such events, more often than not it is in an indulgence of intentional self-parody. Spoken word events can be fun if you allow yourself to enjoy them, so check one out near you!)

One I especially endorse is an event which I enjoyed so much I decided to help put it on: every month and a half (or so), interested parties in the area put some volunteer effort into putting on a Living Closet - what began as a 'wine and cheese' network-session-cum-house-party equal parts folio exhibition and MC-duel now puts on free seven-hour performances for hundreds of fellow artists and art enthusiasts, exhibiting art on the walls of the event, creating art collaboratively on-site and most of all, establishing connections between different, previously unrelated (and unknown) factions of the local arts communities. As people who find themselves on #ansi after 6 years can ensorse, a community can be a compelling thing but a community you can see, hear and (in a few cases) touch can be by so many degrees that much more compelling.

The bottom line: live art still rocks at least as much as computer art, so get your ass out there and check it out.

As far as computer art goes, however, I have still been writing - in prolific and, dare I say, copious quantities - in an online forum which most of you are probably unaware of. Under my 'new' (extra-scene) online identity, Pseudo_Intellectual, I have become the number one contributor (with some 3000 submissions) to the Everything encyclopedia of ideas, thoughts, dreams, poems, knowledge and trivia, brought to you by the guys who run SlashDot.

Beyond that I am still as well active on bulletin boards. No, I am not referring to dial-up Renegade and Telegard BBSes (even the 604's stalwart scene has dwindled to one or two PD megaliths hardly worth calling) nor to telnet boards, which always gave the impression of trying to be something they weren't instead of focusing on new strengths which could be theirs. Message-threading systems (similar to Acheron's discussion bases) are out there and possess great possibility of potency potential. I'm a regular on four or five of them and though it's never quite as good as it was when we were 13, it's still a fair sight better than #ansi.

I never really intended to quit the scene - I never really intended for Mistigris to stop releasing (as anyone I've solicited for art over the past few months will testify...) and though I've had a few quasi-legitimate excuses for its disappearance (hardware incompatibility for house network, leaving me offline, hard drive crashes, switching over to linux and learning it - very slowly, going to college, having a life, etc, etc) the thing (a benign tumour - has anyone here seen Videodrome?) which drives me to release never quite got satisfied: you can take the boy out of the scene but you can't take the scene out of the boy. As such, I'm interested in releasing whatever I can round up from my recent-past scene incarnation (everything I could scrape together since the last mist release) and am interested in getting back into themed pack release and e-mag publication, with one eye to the scene, one to the greater 'net' culture out there and one eye to the real-world art community.(Three eyes?  So I'm feeling a bit mystical...)

But I'll need some help. Get ahold of me if you're interested in working with me and/or the sort of thing I've described.

One of the easiest things I have in mind is another one of these. This pack contains all of my collaborations to date, and it's taken six years to amass everything in it. Yet keep in mind that probably only 10% of the lits I ever wrote for the scene (for collaborations) ever got used. This means a big backlog of much of my best stuff. If you're interested in a Cthulu lit for your next big undestined ANSI, drop me a line and I'll point a nice juicy unreleased poem in your direction.(That sounds unnecessarily sexy, Rowan.)

Beyond that, I'm interested with furthering what was only realized a couple of times in this archive - illustration. That is, instead of the picture and writing only being paired because they're both promoting the same board/group/e-mag/brand of detergent the picture is actually thematically consistant with the subject matter and tone of the poem provided.

Since I can't draw worth a spit, I need someone to help me illustrate - I enjoy working with both high and low-resolution artists, but if no aid is offered, I may have to resort to...

THE ANSIFICATOR!^@%#$!&@----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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And, as if that isn't enough, the ansification process reduces even the most myriad of colourful, natural scenes into an astounding, easy-on-the-eyes, SIXTEENCOLOURS!

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INTROSPECTIVE TRIVIA----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Top 5 favorites in this archive:

as well-integrated pieces of art: as the epitome of clever, punchy, metered and ultimately meaningless 
"lit" for "the scene"- ansi ornamentation:
as eye candy, wholly ignoring (if not discounting) the writing:
1.             id-intox.ans zii-staq.ans us-lok1.ans
2.           us-mess.jpg uu7-salt.ans fv-fc3.ans
3.           nt-btek.ans si-ttt1.ice ar-epic1.ans
4.           us-stars.ans us-gecko.ans df-girl1.ans
5.           nitct-hi.ans us-clock.ans multi-01.drk
*bonus* ctmz-les.ans
(which ones I like the writing most of all you have to figure out for yourself) (or not)

Number of suspected Gif2Ansi'd pieces in this pack: 2.5
(can you guess which ones they are?)
stuffs by Questor and White Trash

Missing from this pack:
While both of the pieces named originally in the infofile in this spot have since been recovered, I just remembered a collaboration I made with CatBones of ACiD for the botany-themed pack which I need to unearth.  Beyond this omission, I believe this archive actually covers my entire body of collaborated work over the past 6 years.

Never released publically before:
tsct-tpo.ans, us-stars.ans, us-hood.rip

Top 5 artists I most regret not having collaborated with: (in descending order)

numb, Inquisitor, Silver Rat, Corinthian, the 4th Disciple
 and I wish I'd made non-blender collaborations with more mist ansi folks! grr! also look for my B-sides release soon!

Top 5 subjectively greatest offenders in most consistent, outstanding or serial failures to make good on promises /
offers of collaboration (especially after the pieces were already written): (in descending order)
aka 'foul temptress'es

Grateful Dead (My 2nd lit, left hanging for... going on seven years now!)
Inner Vision (who killed his group Oasis only after I made a lit for it)
Cain (who I'm convinced leaves the scene every time I find him again. 2 pieces waiting.)
The Extremist (2 pieces, one of which was for his own board!) He let me use his computer to assemble the pack and make this webpage, though, so he's still an okay guy.
Creator (1 piece, but one I really liked) If anyone else wants to try, it's linked here so please do (lemme know)
Inazone (1 piece)
Greatest inspiration to start writing for the scene:

Israfel / GOTHiC

Greatest inspirations to continue writing in the scene:

Schtroumph and Cenobite

Argon and Visions

Greatest discouragements to continue writing in the scene:

BlueDevil and ScrollZ

Members: (er... let me rephrase that)
Artists who knowingly or unknowingly appear in this pack:

Avenger, CatBones, Corinthian, Creator, Cthulu, Darkforce, Dead Soul, Deviate, Dieznyik (Nootropic), 33rie, Etana, The Extremist, Fever, Fire From Heaven, God Among Lice, The Green Hornet, Grim Reaper, Halaster, Happyfish, Haquisaq, Iodine, Iori Yagami, Ironghost, Kitiara, Kyp, Lady Blue, Mage, Mainline, Mavrik, Mmmelk, Mongul, Nitnatsnoc, Patrick Monnahan, Prison Breaker, Prisonernumberone, Prophet, Pure Voltage, Questor, Quip, Scope, Shaft, The Silent Killer, Skrubly, Smokescreen, Spirit of Illusion, Stone the Crow, Tabaqui, Tincat, Tomppa, tRc (?), tricolore, Trip, Ts, Vengeance, Wator, White Trash, Zamfir Worshipper and ZeusII.(and a couple of guys on US-CHAOS.JPG whose sigs I couldn't make out...)

Sites: (not Mistigris sites, but places of interest)
The Living Closet http://livingcloset.vancouver.bc.ca
Everything http://www.everything2.com
BBSes:
b0nk (TabNet BBS) http://bonk.dynip.com
UNCENSORED BBS! http://uncnsrd.mt-kisco.ny.ustable width pad 
The Obloid Sphere http://www.obloidsphere.com

CTHULU HANDY-DANDY ACCESS STAT SHEET ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Handles: Zaphod Beeblebrox; The Happy Flower Man; Anomie; Joconde Flambeau; Mogus Bogus, the Prince of Pride; Diogenes; Pseudo_Intellectual
how "Cthulu" is pronounced: kuh-THOO-loo.  For a more in-depth look, click here.
what a Cthulu is: a giant alien god with an alien for a head from the writings of H.P. Lovecraft.
do I know it's misspelt?: Cthulhu was taken by an early Remorse artist.
e-mail address: pseudo_intellectual@hotmail.com
I can be found: E-mail is your best bet.
GET READY TO READ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 g        re                e     ts
                  Everyone I met on my trip to europe and haven't worked with yet: Tarot, Crayon, Mongi, Alla Xul, Shere Khan dr shizuma and a cast of thousands!